I’m faulty…

Ok… I haven’t been introspective in a while and I’m sure you are all plenty fed up with my ambiguous and nonsensical posts, so lets have something more specific.

From a conversation with my sister: I  neither like nor accept embarassment in any situation. That includes asking for help, needing help, accepting advice, or admitting any other faults in myself (like being wrong for the one or two of you who I know are thinking it). I’m not so stubborn that I don’t do any of those things, it is just hard for me to do most of the time.

That, coupled with a complete aversion to failure, prevents me from doing some things and even casues me to do others… To me, this is one of the ultimate forms of cowardice… one of the few things I’m sure most people wouldn’t accuse me of. I chose that description intentionally because there is currently 3 things that I want (and in one case need) to do and I am a coward for not pursuing them. (Sorry for reverting to vague descriptions, but naming those things would be the same as doing them, at least in 2 of the cases.)

Perhaps disambiguating (at least partially) will be a start?… Have you ever written a letter with an inability to actually send it?