“Home is where the heart is.”
The perception of home is a unique proposition as of late. I’m not entirely convinced that my apartment is really a home for me. Instead it feels kind of like a suite at some hotel that you’re always afraid to leave your stuff lying around lest some maintenance/house-keeping person comes in and sees how you live. Perhaps I wouldn’t feel like I’m so far away from home if I felt more welcome down here. A lot of people like to exchange platitudes but don’t go any deeper. Either they don’t care for outside relationships or feel they already have enough friends (hell, I’d take being an acquaintance).
I thought I had gotten over my aversion to social interaction and social ineptitude in college, but it seems like it was just put on hold as of late. I feel very awkward trying to introduce myself to just about anyone and despite a very considered effort on my part its very hard to get anyone to talk to me much less do something outside of the setting we were initially in. This can certainly just be a product of my own awkwardness and strict sense of propriety; something I suppose I’ll have to get over eventually.
In any case… I get to go home in a few days. I’ll be driving into Cuyahoga Falls on Saturday to spend a few days with Theresa and my Mom. On Wednesday afternoon Theresa and I will be heading down to Columbus to have Thanksgiving with my Dad and Sister. Friday I have a wedding rehearsal to be at with the wedding Saturday and I’ll be driving back to NC on Sunday… don’t know when yet. This will be a wonderful trip… and much needed.
I know what you mean! I am lucky to have Alison down here with me in Dallas, but there are times I get homesick, especially reading about what my friends are doing back home. I have been watching a few lan party groups and after the holidays I’ll probably start going to those. I remember in high school and college I made a lot of friends that way. I also made a lot of friends just hanging out at the ksu airport. The key I think has to be going out and doing stuff you’re interested in and you’ll meet people.
I’ve been trying to find some people that share some of my interests… Unfortunately, the people I work with are all older with families (save 1, but I don’t think he could sneeze without his wife around unless she is otherwise occupied). I may have found some guys at the church I’ve been going to, but like I said in my post, most of them don’t seem very open to new friends. That or they’ve already realized how strange I am…