I astound myself…

If you know my ego… that’s actually rather hard.

Thank you… someone finally just listened to me. I know it was hard to not say anything… I saw it in your face, but it helped.

When is something final?

fi‧nal  /ˈfaɪnl/
–adjective
1.    pertaining to or coming at the end; last in place, order, or time: the final meeting of the year.
2.    ultimate: The final goal is world peace.
3.    conclusive or decisive: a final decision.
4.    constituting the end or purpose: a final result.
5.    pertaining to or expressing the end or purpose: a final clause.

Leaves no room for doubt or second thoughts… and every one of those thoughts spawns a new regret. I’ve never left anything regretting how it ended (doesn’t mean I liked how things went). I usually can get a solemn peace knowing what I did was best for *someone*. In the end this hurts everyone… but I don’t have anything else to do.

I’ll try to have more thoughts tomorrow. Sleep is again eluding me, I missed dinner last night so I’ve had no energy today, and I think I’m getting sick… probably symptomatic of the above, but I’m still not all here.